by Davon Goldberg
How’s it going everyone!? My name is Davon Goldberg and I am the Chief Marketing Officer of the UCLA Challah For Hunger Chapter. In two short pages, I’m going to explain to all of you what Challah For Hunger is and maybe, just maybe, inspire you to do something good with your life and join an amazing organization that fights food insecurity. So sit back, relax, and enjoy my writing that my 11th grade English teacher deemed C+ material.
I am not here to waste your time so if you have absolutely no desire to end food insecurity and create lifelong friendships, here is a link to a funny Onion article I read last night instead of studying for my Econ 134 midterm (Funny Onion Link). If you do care about making this world a better place, Challah For Hunger is the place for you. How does Challah For Hunger save the world? Well let me use my limited economics knowledge to enlighten you. The first step is to have a challah bake in order to make the challah that we sell and oh man do I love selling this challah.
THE CHALLAH BAKE
There are over 70 Challah For Hunger Chapters throughout the world, but I am going to discuss how we do things at UCLA. Did you know that UCLA is the #1 Public University in the United States? It kind of makes all my nights of stress and anxious sleep worth it! Anyways, here is how the bake works. We have a place reserved at UCLA Hillel that allows us to prepare and bake the challah. None of this would be possible without UCLA Hillel. Thank you guys so much! We truly appreciate it.
So now we have our room. Now it is time to get our volunteers, or as I like to call them “inexperienced bakers”. Through various marketing strategies, I am able to wrangle up around 40 volunteers to come in and help us bake all this challah. Our volunteers work non-stop in order to meet my demands. I have a lot of challah to sell and I am not going to let these inexperienced bakers ruin this for me. I know this makes me sound tyrannical, but hear me out. I allow each volunteer to have a three minute bathroom break and one cup of water during the bake. Hahaha I’m just joking. The bakes are SUPER FUN! Volunteers are free to come and go as they please. We have music blasting, unlimited bathroom breaks, and unlimited water supply. Most importantly, we have a group of lovely people working towards ending food insecurity.
We just had our first bake this past Wednesday (Oct. 10). I am happy to say it was a HUGE success! We were able to make 55 challahs with 37 volunteers. The best part of Challah For Hunger, in my humble opinion, is that there is no exclusivity. We have volunteers of all races, religions, and college majors come through. It’s great to see so many dedicated people working together for a great cause. I remember sitting down at this bake and talking to one volunteer about his major, mechanical engineering. I know nothing about mechanical engineering, but it was fun to fake that I knew what I was talking about. What I am trying to say is that Challah For Hunger is for everyone. If you are on the fence about whether Challah For Hunger is right for you, you think too much. Stop thinking and just do. People come to this bake because they just love to bake. Even if you don’t know how to bake, COME! I am terrible at baking challah, but we have untrained individuals who will teach you how to bake this challah. Okay, so now we have all this challah. Now what?
SELLING THE CHALLAH
So now we have all this wonderful challah and we need to sell it. In business, you want to raise your revenue and lower your inventory on hand. We do this by selling our challah! I love this part because it has me running around campus and posting on social media like crazy trying to sell this challah to raise money to fight food insecurity. Where does all this money go? In short, my bank account.
I’m completely joking. I am a lawful and trustworthy person, I swear. The money we raise goes to MAZON and the LA food bank. MAZON is a Jewish response to fighting food insecurity in the United States and Israel. So wholesome, unlike these memes my friends keep sending in my group chats. The Los Angeles Food Bank strives to end hunger on a local scale. We at UCLA Challah For Hunger just care about helping the world….and selling challah. Oh man do we love to sell challah.
At our latest bake, I had the pleasure of walking around and talking to a few of the volunteers. I’m pretty hopped up on caffeine right now so please excuse my excitement. As a side note, the UCLA store charged me $4.50 for a small iced mocha latte. $4.50!!! I think the real evil in the world is happening here. Just something to think about.
Still not convinced that Challah For Hunger is right for you? Stop thinking too much and just come. I urge you to DM me on Instagram with all your reasons as to why you won’t come and I will respond with my rebuttal (Yes, I also just want more followers). Instagram: @uclachallahforhunger
You can also like us on Facebook at “Challah For Hunger UCLA” where we post all of our upcoming events and pre-order forms to buy challah. Our next bake is Wednesday Oct. 17 at 6pm.
Thank you so much for reading my shenanigans. I wish you all the best and hope to see you at our bakes!
Chief Marketing Officer
UCLA Challah For Hunger